Check your list. TWICE.

Everyone's got gift guides up these days. This one isn't for your fitness-focused mom or your overworked (and likely underpaid) assistant. It's for your friend who's exactly like me, i.e. me.

1. The Together Bag



I've always wanted to be just like Kate Hudson in Le Divorce! Remember when they put the gun in it and throw it off the Eiffel Tour? I always wondered if it'd kill someone if it hit them, like I heard a penny would if you threw it off. So gruesome.



2. Rainbow chopsticks



These MOMA chopsticks remind me of this great set I bought in Hong Kong Ikea years ago when I studied there. They're multicolored and they have little nubs on the end to help you grab food more easily. I only have black and light blue left! Maybe these chopsticks will work even without nubby bits.

3. Vince leather jacket



I think the model's dislocated her right shoulder and she's holding it in place with her left hand. Hopefully that isn't an effect of the jacket.

4. Glass tea tumbler



I used to use things like this in China! I think this kind is best because if you put loose tea in, the tea goes in the bottom and the strainer holds it back when you drink. Then if you use a nice flower tea, you can see the flowers expanding in the bottom. And when people ask you about it, you can be all like, "Oh, yeah, this is how we drink tea, you know, back in the motherland. What, your tea comes in bags? Oh. That's nice too."

5. Moleskine/Pacman notebook



If only they had a Frogger version, this notebook would be perfect.



6. A noteable book

Noteable is subjective. To me, one of the strongest qualifiers is whether or not you can find it 50% off at the Strand.

7. Iosselliani rings



Or anything Iosselliani, really.

8. A quiet, spacious, affordable New York apartment

Unlinked and unpictured, as it does not exist.